Arambol, Goa, India - March 2019
Oh Arambol… Where do I even begin???
I guess let’s just start with my Desire List written at the beginning of the “Love & Abundance” Retreat
· Relaxing in every moment
· Connecting with Nature
· Self-Love & Unconditional Love
· Abundance in all forms
· Safe Travels & Safe Journeys
· Beauty in all forms. Beauty Spiritually & in material life forms
· Life Purpose with Healing and Material Life through Purpose in a way where LIFE is balanced in Health, Family, Protection and Love from my future Husband.
· Children of my own in my future Marriage
· More enriching experiences with Friends and Travel
· Financial Abundance and releasing “money blocks”
· TRUST more
· Helping People where my cup is filled enough to share with others and help heal people in different parts of the World
India. I was going to cancel this trip but God… Christ Consciousness had other plans in store for me. Some how I managed to attract more abundance with an unexpected lump-some of money and off I went on this random 15 hour flight BY MYSELF to visit my Soul Tribe. My sisters who live in the UK met me in India. Nikki, Lauren, Abi and Louisa. Along others who I met: Nuria, Sanne, Mariella, Sunny, Sep, Lua, our photographer Sarah. There were plenty of other souls I met in India and on the way back. I did not know what to expect when I entered the Arambol Vortex. All I knew I was in for major life changes, tests, and releasing of fears that were blocking my view in life.
I remember on Saturday 3/3/2019 @ 7am I was in meditation and I had a vision and voice telling me the following:
“Be a work of Work of Art”
I saw in my minds eye an image of my heart in a cage.
Than a Voice popped into my mind where I heard the following message:
“Your heart has been locked.”
I immediately felt, worried, unclear and confused as to why I was having this vision. I immediately thought to myself… “But I am so kind to others and share my love so well to other people. How is my heart in a cage.”
As tears slowly started rolling down my face.
The Voice continued: “You have been closing off true unconditional love. You must act, serve and share through unconditional love. True unconditional love is the source for your life, the more unconditional love that is shared, the abundance, you shall receive. Love in serving through unconditional love for others comes in financial abundance through the work you do. Than will you allow your heart to open, to trust and allow a male Husband you desire to also enter through unconditional love. Release your Heart out of the cage and place it back into your soul. Serve through unconditional love. There, you shall receive unconditional love through a shared partnership with your future Husband/best friend. Remember you have the choice to co-create life with another man, another business partner with a woman or even share your experiences with others as well.”
My take away from the advice given at the beginning of the trip helped me with clarity on how I was not open to love anymore. I was always the giver in my relationships, in my friendships, work-ships, etc. Due to this, I was giving away signs that my heart was closed off. I literally shut off myself to the idea that others can help me, and others can truly love me. Well, no wonder my cup was always empty! For years I was always the provider in my relationships because of the need to control and this idea of “perfection.” Before and after India, I noticed I was attracting men who continue to vent to me about “how women use them for money.” What’s interesting to me is, how in the past I would attract men who would only use me for my money. So, it only made sense I would attract the same parallel human beings who have walked a similar path.
I made the decision to release blocks of men only using me for money, or false friendships using me for my following or who I have worked with, or people with hidden intentions. Life began to shift in a positive way. I am able to TRUST again. Trusting my friends who live in the UK, was the first step of changing my perception of others. By acknowledging my surroundings, my family, my friends, God’s presence again, the Universe, and being grateful for the woman I am. I truly embrace the present. Where I can be thankful for my past, present and future. With an open heart to unconditional love, I am grateful for what I have in the “now.” With every passing moment, we all should strive to walk in Faith. Let go of what no longer serves our lives.